


Empirical Documentation

by Ononymous



Series: Undertale Anniversary Requests 2019 [8]
Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Gen, Pre-Undertale
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-15
Updated: 2019-11-15
Packaged: 2021-01-31 05:29:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,512
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21440986
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ononymous/pseuds/Ononymous
Summary: SURFACE LAB ENTRY 31: Retrieved c-computer from secret annex in True Lab. Condition hard t-to understand. Some parts look brand new, others like they were in an explosion. Like two different computers m-merged together? Basic OS still boots, but files are hit and miss w-whether they load. H-human website discussing data integrity very helpful in handling corruption, but some f-files refuse. Retrieved what looks like a journal? Could l-learn a lot.She did. And she didn't.
Series: Undertale Anniversary Requests 2019 [8]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1486172
Comments: 2
Kudos: 17





	Empirical Documentation

Private Journal of [~C~:SDVJDVJEWOEQ*OHF:]

Monday 5th May, 209X

06:15: Woke up.

06:17: Washed face.

06:20: Brushed teeth.

06:30: Began making breakfast.

06:52: Realised no unusual noises coming from street. Had a look. Royal Guard no longer standing guard at front door. All looks normal. Danger must have passed. Poor man.

07:00: Woke Sans and Papyrus, brought them breakfast. Sans wanted more ketchup. Told him that was unbalancing. Papyrus enjoyed his oatmeal. Took some toast myself.

07:22: Took phone call from King Asgore. Confirmed my suspicions. State of emergency lifted as of 23:15 last night. Soul was successfully recovered. Not happy about it. Poor man. Wrong man for the job. Not my place to suggest delegation, though, he'd never listen.

07:45: Took Papyrus to school. Sent Sans ahead to lab to run diagnostics. Teacher asked me about Papyrus' homework. Was concerned he had neglected to complete it, but turned out to be opposite problem. Wrote so much it would take too much time to accurately mark. Will have to discuss scope with him. Teacher granted him an A by fiat. Had a quick look at it myself, work was B+ level at best. Papyrus needs to focus.

08:52: Arrived at collection site. They reached the throne room. Again. King declined my request for tissue samples. Cannot bear to harm them more than he already has. Project JANUS still on hold then. Despite the potential, could not bring myself to insist on the point. No matter, I have what I need in the meantime.

08:57: Appended file: Project JANUS Summary: [Corrupted]

09:31: Arrived at lab. Broke up argument between two interns about meaningless and trivial human cultural product. Personally think the second of these "Mew Mew" performances has more value than the first. Newer intern looked scandalised when I mentioned this. Must maintain more discipline about irrelevant topics in the lab.

09:40: Caught Sans asleep in pneumospectric analysis suite, knew that meant he'd prepped the machine. Soul in good shape, very strong willpower. Another colour we haven't seen before. Very interesting.

10:11: Two more witnesses arrived in lab, assistant Hamburg will supervise interviews. He pestered me for a raise. Maybe should ask Asgore what would be suitable. Believe that's all monsters who interacted with the human in the 35.6 hours they were at liberty in the Underground.

10:40: Interviews complete. Examining transcripts. Told Sans to tuck his shirt in.

11:06: Review complete. Based on testimony of dominant characteristics, I shall label this soul colour the colour of JUSTICE.

11:07: A phrase leapt out at me in second affidavit from Snowdin Resident #3. Human allegedly made passing comment referencing a "Goat Lady" near their entry point into the Underground. Hmm. Must cross-reference, I recall something...

11:09: Pulled up digitised historical correspondence, pre-war humans definitely associated and conflated boss monsters with livestock of the genus _capra_. Asgore could be called a "goat" by humans. As could the Queen. Possible narrowing of search grid to locate her. Important for Underground morale, critical for Project PHOENIX. Will discuss with Captain Argie if I get a chance. Breaking the barrier a priority for now, though will keep a note for future reference.

11:12 Appended file: Project PHOENIX Summary: [Corrupted]

12:01: Late for lunch. Soul storage procedure took longer than expected. Frustrating.

12:22: Sandwiches very dry. Could probably use ketchup. Private Note: Make sure Sans never finds out.

12:46: Heh, I'm super smart that I have a password on my computer that Sans will never figure out but if he does he's even super smarter than me and handsome and way cooler than 'Dings and I'm gonna give him a raise. Also I loooooove ketchup and I'm a stupid doodoo butt and the legendary fartmFIO:OEHFF"*HFFH:EFOEOHFHHD:UIDF FHFH@@~*F*Y*Y8yfY*8#fyf8wyf88432op'fsj8o4qoo

12:55: Journal file 0505209X manual edit: Denied.

13:17: Journal file 0505209X manual edit: Denied.

13:21: Journal file 0505209X manual edit: Denied.

13:43: Journal file 0505209X manually edited.

14:02: Concluded reprimanding Sans for unauthorised computer access. Was unable to delete his journal entry, merely mask it to conceal the inaccurate statements. Must appreciate his talent at ensuring permanency.

14:15: DT Extractor undergoing maintenance, so dabbling with Project PHOENIX in meantime. Impossible to proceed without both of them, but want to be ready just in case. Reviewed accounts of that night, believe I've identified the relevant flower. Would be dangerous to act on it without everything in place, even if it worked emotional state would be unstable. Would be worse than doing nothing. Find myself humming a tune I cannot recall the source of.

14:37: It's that insipid Mew Mew show they've been watching it in the break room how many times have I said not to oh wait disable voice recording-

14:41: Put away television, not to be used without express permission from me. Don't need ear worms distracting me.

14:59: Ran JUSTICE through DT Extractor. Healthy yield. Definite correlation between attested force of personality and DT quantities, more than any post-war specimen, especially PATIENCE, and almost as much as specimen CHI. Still interested in JANUS. Perhaps when Asgore is asleep. Drake reports that's less often these days, less predictable. Hmm. Must plan carefully. Benefits could be bountiful. Would hate to sacrifice CHI just to break barrier. May be hard to delay if King discovers CHI's existence. Pressure to honour his promise would be intolerable. One more required, then.

15:00: Appended File: Specimen CHI Summary: [Corrupted]

16:00: Dry run of Prototype SATURN. Results dark. Darker. Potential. Must quiz others for what they think. Could rewrite what we know of this world. Or others. Told Sans to get his feet off the control panel.

16:05: Appended File: Prototype SATURN Summary: [No Longer Exists]

16:06: No, too risky.

16:07: Deleted file [Prototype SATURN Summary]

16:20: Call from school. Papyrus in some sort of trouble. Said I'd discipline him, but they want me to talk in person. Must finish work here.

17:23: Concluded report on JUSTICE, sent it with intern to deliver to the King. He won't read it. The other five are gathering dust on his desk. Acting like it never happened is his coping mechanism. Unhealthy, but not much I can do. Emotions not my speciality.

17:28: Called principal, told her I'm just leaving lab, will arrive as fast as I can.

17:30: In principal's office, she seemed surprised to see me despite my assurances of haste.

17:50: Concluded conference with Papyrus' teacher. He got into a disagreement with them over some physics quibble. He tried to explain what I taught him last week. Neither were correct, but Papyrus was closer. Had to explain how physics really works to faculty. Clearly agreed with me, as expected. Advised Papyrus to discuss future disagreements with me instead of challenging teacher directly. Papyrus wants spaghetti for dinner. Very well.

19:00: Decent meal. Papyrus was happy with it at least. Good. While eating, Sans randomly asked me about Queen Toriel. Did he crack the encryption on my earlier entries? Gave no sign either way, but he's good at that. I stuck to public record, that one anecdote Gerson told me about her at the party for when Prince Asriel was born. Seemed satisfied. Said he [sic] "Goatta meet her" sometime. Not sure what he means.

19:05: Had Sans explain what a "goatta" is. Hard to understand his obsession with excessive wordplay. Very frustrating. Words should be concise, twisting meaning is how we lead to accidents. At least I wasn't whoopee cushioned again.

19:16: I was whoopee cushioned again. Papyrus still giggling. Wonder how he'd like it.

20:10: Sans watching Papyrus watch television. Gives me some room for planning. Full meeting about SATURN tomorrow, bring Sans on board, perhaps literally. Observe Asgore's sleeping patterns and see if the basement is unguarded. Limited window of opportunity for JANUS, preservation techniques perhaps gives me three weeks to procure a sample. In the meantime, will proceed with SATURN next week. If results are what I hope, can work with Argie to narrow search grid for the Queen, and can explain PHOENIX. Asgore will definitely be on board, but I'm not sure how she will feel. All comes down to SATURN. Oh, I carried this spring home from the lab.

20:11: Appended File: UnnamedRecording.wav: ["Boing!"]

20:12: Will have to return it. Time to disengage from work. Need decent sleep.

20:43: Phone rang. It was Asgore. Listened. Barely comprehensible. He lasted the whole day. Longer than average. Contacted Doctor Drake for him. Poor man.

21:00: Confirmed Papyrus has no homework, sent him to bed. Sans watching comedy shows.

21:30: Brushed teeth for bed.

21:45: Settled into bed.

22:22: Fell asleep. [Automated entry from experimental somnal detector]

23:59: Synchronise Journal Entry with cloud server backup...

**Author's Note:**

> Original suggestion: May I request a fic about Dr. Gaster's daily routine? Something a little goofy would be preferable.
> 
> Pastebin Version: https://pastebin.com/GkncLuDN
> 
> Let me know what you think, and thanks for reading!


End file.
